Savage House: A Review

Charlie Martin, Editor-in-Chief

The Savage House is hidden away in the parking lot of Mission Valley mall, surrounded by rattling fences and sectioned off in a way that accentuates the theme of this haunted house – an infection that spread throughout a science lab.  


This attraction was open during the month entire month of October and cost $16 per person. After you completed it, you had the opportunity to purchase a museum tour of the scariest, most successful horror movies for an additional $5.


Entering this haunted attraction is an anxiety like no other – as a rush of air shocks the entering group, the door slowly opens. The pit of fear in your stomach grows.


With murky lighting and a ghastly fog, sight was not easy. The lights flickered, and the background noise of gentle screams induced an early sense of panic and what did I get myself into?!


The first room looks like a science lab and all the amenities that lay inside it, with a promise that the virus is controlled. As you pursue the course, various actors resembling zombies jump out at you. With realistic-looking makeup and special effects that could only result in months of mastery, the actors chase you down, growling in your face – but don’t worry, they can’t touch you.


When I walked in with my group of 5 people, we only made it to the bathrooms (the second room of the layout) before one of the men ran out of the EXIT door screaming. He ended up reentering, then running into a wall. However humourous this is now, in the moment the only thing that clogged my throat was a silent scream in anticipation for the next scare.


After the bathrooms came an eerily still and messy dining hall. With the first look, I settled down a little – it appeared empty. However, like most of the rooms, the actors hid, remaining calm before jumping out.


The gruesome actors showed no sense of human compassion, even managing to smile creepily while pushing their hot, zombie breath on your face when you ventured too close. They disregarded their rooms, and chased you into other levels of the haunted attractions based on your fear level.


The next room was pitch black, and I had to feel my way out of the nightmare with two of my group members plastered onto my back (one friend, one stranger. Life and death situations really bond people).


One room provided a forced autopsy on a dummy, a human-like zombie shoving tools into groups hands and telling them where to cut or shine light onto.


With each passing room came small compartments that you wouldn’t believe that a grown humane could fit into.  But just as you relaxed, they struck – banging doors and yelling in a throaty, gruesome manner.


The rooms were mainly dim and cramped, some filled with tables of dead bodies and half eaten food, others with more rooms and creepy zombies staked out behind.


Just as it ended, the house did not let up in it’s homely manners. Trapped in dog kennels and glass doors, the actors shook and pounded on anything they could, pretending to scratch their way towards you.


The finale? A chainsaw jumping out of the musty lightings and chasing you until you left.
Overall, this haunted attraction did not disappoint, as the special effects and creepy zombies hosts gave their best to keep the guests scared and screaming for the 25 minutes they were stuck in the lab, screaming to get out, but dying to go in for a second round.